How Not to Ask for Money Online

Not long ago, I wrote a magazine piece for which I had to interview a tech gadfly. Since we spoke (or, more accurately, emailed), he has since added me to his email list, and I receive updates, or mandates, which seems a more appropriate way of describing his writing style, of such length that I don't bother to read them. As smart as this person is about his subject matter, pithy he ain't.

Still, I remain subscribed--having never actually subscribed myself, but I suppose I can forgive anyone who's helped me on deadline for assuming my interest. And I do not unsubscribe because of my spineless inability to say no to pushy acquaintances. And who knows? There may come a day when I find the time to pull out my dictionary of technical terms and read these rather academic dispatches.

Though I've tended to blow off these updates, I could gather from quickly browsing the occasional one that Mr. Guru was expanding his research in his subject area. I imagined a request for funding would be sent shortly, and it was, and I promptly blew it off, not having been sufficiently engaged in the Guru's enterprise in the first place.

Imagine my surprise when recently--the day after New Year's no less; has this person no marketing sense!--I receive a dispatch that reads:

Dear (My email address, not my name, is inserted here),

(Guru's name/gurus's email) would like to be paid through PayPal.

-----------------------------------
Money Request Details
-----------------------------------

Amount: (Amount of what I am to pay to continue receiving these dispatches I never asked for is inserted here)

Several explanations for this rather obnoxious and clueless request for funding have come to mind:

1. The guy is European; perhaps they have fewer qualms about asking for money there. Perhaps this is a common way to ask for funding in France or Belgium; provide the means of receiving payment before you've secured interest? Seriously, I don't know. There may be a cultural disconnect here, and people may be much more comfortable requesting payment for unsolicited work. If that's the case, we have a system here in the U.S. for requesting micropayments called ads, or donation buttons; they require people to opt in first before paying.

2. The guy is a techie, though some of this stuff transcends subject expertise and falls into the realm of common sense. Perhaps he should hire a Web marketer to help him promote his work. Or maybe someone could subtly offer some key tenets to requesting payment, such as, 1) you get affirmation before offering the PayPal account. 2)You get an opt-in before asking for payment. 3) If you fudge the opt-in rule and subscribe someone to your feed or newsletter, offer them a quiet means of opting out--quiet meaning any way other than a direct note ("Get me offa this thing!") or a passive aggressive blog post such as this one, conveying one's desire to not be subscribed any longer.

Mr. Guru's approach is tantamount to being called by a telemarketer who immediately goes into her spiel before you can say you're not interested, and then even offers a selection of amounts her organization will accept as donations. You are forced to be the jerk who has to interrupt her and say, "Scuse me, scuse me, Ms. Thing taking up my time, I'm sorry but no." Or, if you are guilt ridden like my mother, you apologize profusely for donating far less than the "suggested" amount and pay a small ransom to get the person off the phone. Perhaps that's where I get my Opt-In-Victim Status...

Let me be clear: I do not begrudge anyone asking for funding. With more soloists and bloggers opting to control their vocational destinies, we need to grapple with the awkwardness of asking to be paid for our trouble, our content, our expertise. It seems the B-sphere is only just beginning to establish ways of compensating valued writers. But some of these attempts reek of self-absorption and low awareness of others. The Blogosphere is supposed to raise awareness and develop relationships, not simply provide you with a mailing list.

micropayments

Comments

[Joy Des Jardins]

Oh Jor, you'd be proud of me. I've actually gotten much better at saying "No" right off the bat...well, sometimes it takes a little longer; but trust me....you'd be proud. I must say, reading this really incensed me...has this guy NO pride or ethics?

[kirsten]

Too funny. We talk about asking for money today too - and the crazy responses. Happy New Year, Jory! Hope you are well!

[Felix Gerena]

Jory, as european, I must say that is not common practice in Europe and I´m afraid it is not common practice anywhere else.

I see two basic possibilities to understand this guy´s conduct:

1. He does not care about what others can think about him. He just asks for funding. If you like him you help him and if not, you just don´t.

2. He is not aware of the effect he produces in others. He thinks the net is a place for mutual help and trust and without working on his fundraising style, he starts to ask for money to all the people he knows.

Take care,

Felix

[Phil Gerbyshak]

Wow! This is bold, even for the Internet. And it's funny! Thanks for sharing Jory!

[Allan]

Maybe there are more people out there like your mother than we imagine. This guy could just be playing percentages.

With my mom it took years to convince her that she had a phone for her convenience, not everyone else's. She now hangs up after her second "no." It's a start.

[kate]

Hello, I am 31 old female, living alone, in divorce. I live in Georgia (not USA, but EUROPE). I have terrible financial problems and plus, can not find job. I know English and Russian languages, I am looking for a sponsor, a charity for 150 USD to buy a computer and make translations at home to make some mOney. Is it possible to find such kind of help???
thank you
Kate

[tee shirt femme]

Exact solidarity foresees the requirements of several other as compared to extol it truly is really. [url=http://www.foot-center.fr/]tee shirt femme[/url] tee shirt femme